Part 3, Popular arguments against women having the priesthood: A kind of Q&A

The following are the most popular arguments I've heard or read against women having the priesthood. I felt impressed to wind up my three-part post by addressing them.

As with my previous posts (Part 1, Introduction: Notions and Testimony; A reason why people may be reacting with fear or anger about women having the priesthood; and, Part 2, Scriptural defense of women having the priesthood), I approached this one in prayer and love. I have tried to be thoughtful and respectful, and to ground my thoughts in scripture. I have a strong testimony that women will have the priesthood, and I felt hugely prompted and subsequently inspired to write this (very long) three-part blog post. Four-part, if you count the kind of preface about the danger of notions. I have loved every minute of doing it. I hope it will be received in the spirit of love that it was written in.

1. “Women have babies. Men have the priesthood.”

The complement to motherhood is fatherhood, not the priesthood.

Both men and women create babies. Without sperm, the egg is useless for creating life. It is a man and a woman both working with God to create life. Beyond the biological facts, I am afraid that the equation “motherhood=priesthood” is damaging to the divine role of fatherhood. It separates and distinguishes fatherhood from priesthood. I am afraid this flawed equation can overshadow the office and duties of fatherhood, trivialize the father’s role in spiritual perspective of family and church, and alienate him from his children. Ideally, of course, fatherhood would be one in the same as priesthood, since priesthood is the power of God, and fathering a child, creating life, is also a power of God. But to delineate and separate fatherhood from priesthood in this way and to say “motherhood=priesthood” is to eclipse and trivialize fatherhood.

I’m not saying that women with the priesthood would suddenly start shirking their duties with their children. Rather, it seems like holding the power of God could only improve a woman’s mothering abilities in nurturing, teaching, and caring for her children.

2. “If women get the priesthood, we’ll all just become the same, and the differences between men and women are divinely appointed. Women who want the priesthood don't understand, cherish, or value their roles as women.”

I completely agree that men and women are different and those differences are divinely appointed. Divinely appointed means appointed by God. I cannot believe that introducing the power of God to women would obliterate the differences in men and women that God put there in the first place, and turn us all into a gender-neutral blob. I think both men and women having the priesthood would only perfect and enhance the different strengths, talents, and identities men and women have. We would all become Godly. It seems to me that seeking to become a Godly women is cherishing and valuing one's role as a woman.
           Also, please see point 7 for thoughts on judging the intents and understanding of others.           

3. “Women can still serve without the priesthood.”

That’s true. And so can men. The idea is that having the priesthood is having the ability to minister to others in an enhanced capacity. Service is kind of the point of the gospel, so I can only view the genuine desire to bless the lives of others in as many ways possible as consummately Christ-like. And think of the possibilities for the church to grow and expand if all of its members and their talents are available for use in whatever capacity or calling the church has need for. We are to build the Kingdom of God and to help bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man (which is why we do missionary work, temple work, home and visiting teaching, everything that we do…to bring people to Christ and to give them an opportunity to have eternal life through the principles and ordinances of the gospel). How much more effective is a person serving in God’s work if he or she has His power? I’d say infinitely.

4. "I'm a feminist, but I don't support women having the priesthood. It's not my gender role to have the priesthood."
          I kind of cringe when I see the gender equality issue brought up. For me, it's more about the fundamental fact that we're all children of God, and we're all meant to become God one day, meaning we'll share His perfection, glory, power, and everything else that God is and has. The priesthood, remember, is the power of God. It is not inherently male. God can give His power to whomever He wants. As far as I've been able to find, there has been no official declaration that women cannot or will never legitimately hold the priesthood through ordination. There's a lot of status quo and "that's just the way it is" and these arguments here. But the church and the gospel are still being revealed and perfected, through the prophet asking questions and receiving revelation, and through the people of the church to be ready for revelation and change. To restrict the priesthood to being exclusively and forever for men is to, in my mind, deny God's infinite power to do with His own power what He will. To equate priesthood with man is a notion, which as we've discussed many times, is a dangerous obstruction to further understanding. To bind God to a notion is just plain not a good idea.
          Also, in the line of things that make me cringe: equating the priesthood with gender roles. It may well be that God will only ever, for all eternity, give the priesthood to men, which would be a divinely appointed role belonging to men. As I've said, I have yet to see a definitive answer on it. When I do, I will accept it wholeheartedly. I love this gospel. But back to the cringe-factor of equating priesthood with gender roles: Gender roles are part of man's society and culture. God is infinite, all-powerful, and ultimately beyond mortal man's total comprehension and supersedes a cultural set of mortal norms or gender roles. They're just different animals. It seems like it might not be such a great idea to equate the power of God with mortal gender roles like who typically makes money, does laundry, or takes out the garbage.
          My interest in this question is how women and men both become like God. To hold His power seems to be necessary to becoming perfected like Him. It seems beside the point and not fitting the case to argue that women asking for the priesthood are trying to become equal, more equal, or more than men. The standard is not men; the standard is God.

*5. “Women having the priesthood will cheapen it for the men.”
Again, the priesthood is the power of God, not the power of the holder. He can give it to whomever He wants to. And God is all-powerful: God has created the universe and all creation; Jesus raised the dead, cause the blind to see, the lame to walk, healed the sick, cleansed the leprous; took all of our sins on Him and atoned for them so we had a hope and chance to work through our imperfect, mortal state to someday become cleansed, perfected, and one with Him; He himself rose from the dead…the list is endless. He has incomprehensible power. Alma 26:35 says He has all power. 1 Nephi 7:12 says he can do all things. Jeremiah 32:17 says nothing is too hard for God to do. Matthew 28:28 says God has all power in heaven and earth. There are tons more verses that will attest to the infinite power of God. So, His power is absolute, infallible, eternal, and inexhaustible. That power is also the priesthood, since the priesthood is the power of God. I don’t believe that giving God’s power to all of God’s children can weaken, cheapen, or degrade it. Rather, I think it would achieve its full efficacy if all of God’s children shared in God’s power. It seems like it would be that much more complete. After all, that’s the goal of mortality, for us all to live with and like God, to ultimately become God in the sense that we become one with His perfection, glory, and power. That is heaven. That is eternal life.

*6. “Women will overrun the church if they have the priesthood.”
This one makes no sense to me. We’re constantly being told that compared to men, women are the spiritual giants, the nurturers, the selfless givers (I’m not saying I agree with this; see point 10 for more on this). How would having something as pure as the power of God suddenly turn such saintly, angelic women into slavering, power-hungry demons bent on destroying the church, specifically all men in the church? Even if that were to happen, there is a really cool fail-safe in how the priesthood (power of God) operates, to prevent abuse of that power, in D&C 121:36-37:

That the rights of the priesthood are inseparably connected with the powers of heaven, and that the powers of heaven cannot be controlled nor handled only upon the principles of righteousness.

That they may be conferred upon us, it is true; but when we undertake to cover our sins, or to gratify our pride, our vain ambition, or to exercise control or dominion or compulsion upon the souls of the children of men, in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens withdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved; and when it is withdrawn, Amen to the priesthood or the authority of that man.

(Quick note on use of “man”: it is used to comprehend both men and women throughout the scriptures, so its use here would not be a good argument for only men having the priesthood. Unless you also want to argue that only men can get into the celestial kingdom through a temple-sealed marriage [D&C 131:1-4].)

Cool, isn’t it? If you use God’s power in an ungodly way, you lose it. It’s as simple as that. You can have no place in or kinship with God unless you are really one with Him, by obedience to His commandments. So there is no danger of a new race of demonic harpy-women overrunning the church. They would literally be incapable of it.

*7. “It’s only power-hungry, vain, borderline apostate, malcontented sinful women asking for the priesthood.” And, spoken or simply implied: “They really need to be shamed and persecuted into silence.”

Again, the priesthood is the power of God, not the power of man. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:33 and 3 Nephi 13:33 to seek for the kingdom of God and His righteousness. Endowed members have covenanted to build up the kingdom of God. That’s all we do, really, with our callings and missionary work and temple ordinances and home teaching and visiting teaching and raising our children. I don’t see how looking for an avenue to serve others and build the kingdom is a sinful thing. Besides which, see my previous point, if you are in fact any of those negative things, the priesthood isn’t going to do you any good, because you’ll be incapable of exercising it.

Also, “Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again” (Matthew 7:1-2). Because: “For thou [God] only knowest the hearts of the children of men,” “Yea, and he looketh down upon all the children of men; and he knows all the thoughts and intents of the heart; for by his hand were they all created from the beginning” (2 Chronicles 6:30 and Alma 18:32).

So really, judging the intents of those asking for the priesthood is impossible, as we are not God, and is furthermore a sin, in that God has told us not to do it. I mean, feel free to go ahead and verbally or mentally judge me or anyone else supporting this discussion. It’s just not a good idea to do so.

*8. “I feel so sad for these women asking for the priesthood. They don’t understand the gospel. If they would just read their scriptures and pray and actually have a testimony, they’d see the error of their ways and come back to God.”

See my previous paragraph on not judging.
            Also, please be aware that if you're holding up your understanding of the gospel as absolute, unchangeable, and absolutely perfect (which you are doing, to some degree, when you bemoan someone else's "lack of understanding"--really, you're just saying that they don't see the room or the table the same way you do. Saying someone is wrong or ignorant doesn't make you right or enlightened), you are closed off to receiving further light and knowledge, from anywhere, even from the Spirit, because you won't be looking or asking for more if you think you have everything already. You may want to take a close look at your concept of the gospel to make sure you haven't made a notion out of it that is keeping you from growing and learning. This is a deeply personal thing that must be done with honesty, prayer, and the Spirit. I'm not telling you one way or another what to think. Only the Spirit can confirm truth, and the Spirit manifests the truth of all things when you ask with a pure heart and real intent and faith in Christ (Moroni 10:4).

Let me tell you from experience: As I’ve spent hours and hours researching, studying, reading, and praying about this, I have felt the Spirit very strongly. I have been prompted and guided all along the way. In my personal study, I have been prompted to certain scripture passages that were not anywhere near my mind that have illuminated my understanding. I have felt the Spirit witness to me over and over with power, love, and sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7) and peace (D&C 6:23) that I’m on the right path as I’ve prayerfully studied this. Few things can be more painful than to have someone (a stranger on a message board, your facebook friend, a home teacher from six years ago) outrightly dismiss or condemn such a faith-promoting experience and solid, Spirit-borne testimony as being sinful, or ignorant, or evidence of a lack of testimony or relationship with God.

I am a faithful member. I respect, love, and sustain the prophet, the apostles, the general authorities, my local authorities. I pray. I study the scriptures. I pay tithing. I go to church and take the sacrament. I do my calling. I teach my kids. We do FHE. We do family prayer and scriptures. My husband and I go to the temple. I have a question about women having the priesthood. You’d be surprised how many good people have questions.

It is not a sin to ask questions. We are told we should ask questions (James 1:5, Moroni 10:4-5). In fact, all of revelation comes from asking questions (see the Restoration, the Word of Wisdom, the 1978 expansion of the priesthood, your patriarchal blessing, any of your personal revelation, etc). If the question does not seem important to you, or if you have spiritual confirmation that keeps you supporting the status quo, that’s totally fine. But please don’t condemn people who have questions.

And please remember, what you say to one person who is studying this issue is to say it to everyone who thinks or feels the same. When you link an article on your facebook and bemoan the poor, ignorant, sinful soul who wrote it, be aware that you’re calling all of your friends who ask the same question ignorant and sinful. Degrading someone for seeing things differently from you do does not make you right. It only engenders pain and bad feelings.

For more on what may be a more constructive, testimony-building (and definitely not as judgy, condemning, or contentious) response to feeling fear or discomfort when someone asks a question or believes differently from you, please see my final paragraph on the post “Women and the Priesthood.”

*9. “I don’t ever want the priesthood. I have enough to do and worry about.”

That’s fine. No one is compelled to have the priesthood, as compulsion is directly contrary to the nature of the priesthood (see point 5). But like I said in point 6, the whole point of being in the church is to serve and build the kingdom. We are to be “anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness” (D&C 58:27). Acting with God’s power can only bring righteousness, as that’s all God is: truth and light and righteousness. His power can’t be anything other than what He is.

*10. “Women have the priesthood. I have more claim on the priesthood than the priesthood holder does, because I can get a blessing from him. He can’t give himself a blessing. The priesthood is not a selfish thing.”

All true points. The point is off, though. A priesthood holder cannot give himself a blessing, true. But he has as much claim on another priesthood holder for a blessing as a non-priesthood holder or woman does. And yes, the priesthood is not for the holder to practice ordinances on himself. But again, the point of having the priesthood is to serve others, so I don’t understand the point of implying that a woman wanting the priesthood is being selfish. If she has the priesthood, she is equally unable to bless herself as a man is to bless himself. So it seems more selfish to sit back and lounge in the claim you have on others’ priesthood than it is to go and use your own holding of the priesthood to serve.

Now for the asterisks, in points 5-10. These are all damaging, sexist, ignorant arguments. They all characterize women, whether they want the priesthood or not, as basically selfish, domineering, corrupting, evil, and lazy. Not a good thing. I would find it hard to find a general conference where there wasn’t at least one talk about how Satan is trying to attack, degrade, and derail women from their divine roles. Characterizing women in such a condemning way is bad news.

Along the same lines, here are two more arguments. These ones are also sexist and condemning, but they condemn men. Actually, the first is sexist and damaging to both men and women.

11. “Men need the priesthood. Women are so naturally pure and good and charitable. They’re much closer to God than men are. So men need the priesthood to elevate them to the spiritual level of women. And that’s why women don’t need the priesthood, they’re already spiritual and good enough.”

The standard is God, not women. We are all to become perfect, like God, not just spiritually exceptional. Having God’s power (the priesthood) is essential to becoming like Him.

I also have more faith in men than to believe that they’re essentially spiritually inferior to women. To propagate this myth is to continue false and damaging perceptions of men and women. It disempowers men and provides them a cop-out: “Well, I’m a just a man, you’re a woman, it’s your job to be the spiritually strong one.” It also puts women on a pedestal and elevates them to the level of a false god, when men are compared to women for spiritual perfection.

12. “Men need the priesthood, or they won’t come to church.”

This is kind of a rehash of the previous point. Again, I don’t believe men are spiritually inferior. I believe that a true convert to the gospel of Jesus Christ will go to church, whether they have the priesthood or not.

But this is kind of moot point. Since men have the priesthood.

13. “Men will stop coming to church if women have the priesthood.”

I have no idea where this one comes from. Maybe I’m just really lucky in that I have an awesome husband, dad, and father-in-law that I cannot even imagine men refusing to go to church if women have the priesthood.

            I want to thank everyone throughout the church who has contributed to this dialogue. It is scary to be a voice different from the rest, but once you hear someone say what you think and feel, they have created a safe place for discussion. I think it's going to take more time and voices for this issue to gain ground and for people to really be safe from persecution when they talk about it, so I'm doing what I can to help out. I have felt prompted to write what I have and I have been undeniably inspired while writing. I feel confident about what I have said. It has been a hugely spiritual, very testimony-building experience for me. If there is a mission for these posts beyond that, I hope they fill their duty. I hope these blog posts get spread far and wide J

And I’d like to thank my kids for taking such great naps over the last few days so I could finish this. J And my husband, for picking up the slack while I spent the last few nights glued to my computer and my scriptures. You guys are the best.